Funny Facebook Status Updates is a great way to brighten up your profile page and we share the best ideas here on geekersmagazine. You have landed on the right page. This article is all about very funny Facebook status messages that have been written by real people. You will find here all Funniest Facebook Status. Read the full collection of the funny Facebook statuses and tell us what you think. Look at your status, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine. But if you stopped posting about other things and made this your status, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. One day your prince will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost and too stubborn to ask for directions.

Funny quotes about dating.

Where do you get off crossing state lines? State line is the dividing line. You can check the employee handbook. Oh, can I check the employee handbook Lloyd? Well, does it say anything about me choking a man with my bare hands?

In that spirit, I decided to cheer you up with some funny quotes that can motivate you and inspire you to make something great out of your life. Here are 28 funny motivational quotes for you to cheer you up and motivate you.

Four foot high speed bumps to be used to solve inner city traffic congestion. Yahoo and Hotmail email passwords hacked Today it has been revealed that over , email passwords from some of the worlds biggest providers have been hacked and published online. We have publish part of the list of passwords here. Inventor finds way to turn gold into carrots Inventor Iyron Ick has found a method of turning ordinary household gold in to edible carrots.

Nicki Minaj lyrics and pictures: There are , , , websites on the internet. Of these , , , can certainly be considered strange. But there are far fewer that are truly weird and even fewer that are what-on-earth-is-that-all-about-weird. This book brings together the weirdest of these weird sites for your amusement. When visiting the sites you will meet some rich, ugly people who desperately want to marry you, you will have the opportunity to join ‘The Interplanetary Society for the Hard of Thinking’ and you will be shown how to send a plague of wasps to ‘destroy’ those websites that you hate.

So, power up that old cathode-ray tube and get surfing!

The 32 Dirty Quotes of all Time

Between the stresses of deadlines to meet, traffic jams, financial obligations etc. Our Funny Marriage Quotes can help you with that. So grab your mate well, not literally and take a few minutes to sit back and enjoy our Funny Marriage Quotes. I should have asked for a jury.

Delicious sarcastic sayings and quotes for you to enjoy, laugh at or even to use. Simplified dating advice. Search. Primary Menu Skip to content. Facebook; Twitter; Search for: Funny birthday sayings quotes Quotes about beauty Anniversary sayings Bitter quotations Quotations birthday.

Season 1 Space Pilot “Space. It seems to go on and on forever. But then you get to the end and a gorilla starts throwin’ barrels at you. Fry, discovering he’s in the future: My God, it’s the future. My parents, my coworkers, my girlfriend, I’ll never see any of them again! Fry and Bender’s encounter at the suicide booth: Please select mode of death: Panel slides down showing the implements of death Bender: Bring it on, baby! Also, this exchange that takes place immediately after: Bender impatiently, with Fry cowering in the corner: Casually, to Fry By the way, my name’s Bender After both his arms fall off, Bender puts one arm back on and then grabs the arm he used to reattach his first one and puts it back on.

Gay bar

More specifically, coming up with one of your own. Now, not every website has a space for this. This applies to you. The Purpose Of Your Dating Headline And Where It Shows Up Your dating headline is one of the first things on your profile that sets you apart from the crowd of posers, six-pack-selfy-takers, nimrods, and lowlifes.

On POF and MillionaireMatch , headlines are almost impossible to miss in her search results, so yours needs to make a good first impression.

The Year-Old Virgin () Quotes on IMDb: Memorable quotes and exchanges from movies, TV series and more.

We generate one type of profile using one of the many techniques that we have found to work for you. Get some ideas on how to fill in the blanks in your own profile Ok, we just made up that profile. These profiles have been carefully engineered based on the techniques that have been proven to be successful time and time again. They have been tested, and the response rates are significantly higher than that of ordinary, generic profiles.

Read more free tips for writing better profiles or learn why this profile would actually work. Did you know that your first email matters a lot more than what you write in your profile? Have you thought about what the first email you send should look like?

+ Funny Nicknames For Guys

When you are single, you have all the options in front of you to do exactly what you want. This is a good time to nurture newer relations, and get to know more people. Unlike the rest of them, you are not bound down by routine, commitments, or schedules. So, you have all the time to explore, enjoy, and understand the world.

These days funny quotes about being single are doing the rounds. Such quotes are the ones, which go to prove that being single is not a great deal at all. “I’m dating a woman now who, evidently, is unaware of it.” – Garry Shandling “Dear gay men, Please stop being so much kinder, funnier, and more attractive than straight men.

It’s a policy statement. How complicated is this? Witch burners have been shunned, ostracized, lampooned, marginalized, discriminated against, deplatformed. Protect your witch burners and they’ll protect you. Jeremy Renner’s quasi documentary “Hansel and Gretel” is all the evidence we need. Don’t enter residential premises constructed from high sugar content building materials.

Unless YHVH builds a house they labour in vain. I think George Washington thoroughly knew this concept. I think he was hoping his posterity would include a few good witch burners Join the dots team.

Futurama / Funny

Why don’t we just cuddle? You know they have surgery to fix that. My last boyfriend was 4″ bigger. Oh no, a flash headache! My 8-year-old brother has one like that.

On August 26, , during a campaign event in Iowa, Donald Trump did an impression of Asian negotiators for the crowd, using broken English. Many in the crowd found it funny.

Not your original work? Add source Few things provide more creative inspiration in this world than relationships. They’re the subject of a million songs, they’re the focus of a million poems, and they provide endless material for artists and cartoonists everywhere. Love and relationships are the base of our society and humanity, so it’s only natural that you have to “deal” with them at least once in your life.

If at first, the young love seems like a pink fluffy cloud and fireworks, then later it all calms down, and you don’t have to be the perfect human specimen to prove your love. Long-term relationships are mostly finding someone as awkward and weird as you. The cartoon couples depicted in this list have surely mastered that. Take a look at this list of our favorite relationship comics to see what we mean. Compiled by Bored Panda, the hilarious collection of couple memes below is sure to make you smile if you’ve ever been in a relationship.

Also, these relationship memes will definitely provide you with some answers about relationships if you haven’t been in one.

Sh*t Gay Black Guys Say